The Pursuit of Unity


When my husband and I were first announced as “Mr and Mrs” at our wedding ceremony, it was a beautiful moment. We had become one, as husband and wife. In an instant, I felt like I had transitioned from being a Miss to a Mrs. His name was now my name, and we had become a family; united.

However, it didn’t take long before I began to realise that becoming one was much more than a simple name change. Just like the name change itself – which even after six months is still a work in progress – becoming unified takes time. A lot of time. It’s a process; a journey full of beauty and laughter, but also tension and patience.

A wise man once wrote, “Above all things, put on love, which binds everything together in perfect unity.” When pursuing unity, we need to hold love closely. We need to consciously ‘put on’ or clothe ourselves with love, as if we were wearing a garment. Love is meant to be worn, it’s meant to become part of our identity. It’s meant to influence us. To clothe yourself with love needs to be a daily action. Love is not meant to be worn once, and then thrown away. It’s your staple; that item that never gets left in your wardrobe. Just like a warm jacket on winter’s day, love has a purpose. It’s intentional, essential, and continual. Without love at the centre of our marriage, we are no longer pursuing perfect unity, but we simply begin to coexist.

Unity is much more than physically coming together, or being announced as man and wife. The true pursuit of unity within a marriage encompasses goals, passions, and life direction. It’s knowing that you are on the same team, running the same way and cheering each other on, despite the journeys we may face together. Through hard days and through victories, through giggles of joy and tears of sadness, we will continue to become one, over and over again, as we pursue each other in love.


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